I have finally made some time to speak about my skin story.
It’s been a battle for many years. One I have lost several times. One that made me question my beauty. One that I am still fighting.
Everyone is aware of Acne but not everyone suffers from it. Some have minor cases of Acne, whereas others live with it for many years. It’s not just Acne that leaves you with a problem, it’s the scars that come along with it. Both mentally and physically.
I feel that at least one person out there needs me to be strong for them. Tell them that it’s gonna be ok. We are all made up of skin and bones, a simple flaw shouldn’t have this much power over us.
I’ve always had a mild case of acne, since the age of about 15-16. I also had a severe case of pimple-picking. I won’t lie to myself, it was maybe the only reasons my skin got so bad so quickly. I was left with many dark scars, ones that never faded. Not only did I have these on my face but my back too.
I later discovered make up and managed to cover up most of it. Which was a great temporary fix but I still lacked in confidence, self esteem and self-love. Although many of my friends overlooked the hideousness it was, others would laugh or make fun of it.
We all have insecurities. We either let it get the best of us or we make the best of ourselves. I decided to suffer in silence because I felt like nobody would understand. I even started to make fun of my scars myself, before anybody else could. I thought it was my way of showing acceptance. It wasn’t. That was the doorway to let others see a flaw in me they had never noticed before. I pointed out my own insecurity.
I realise the pressure has increased a lot more for this generation compared to when I was a teenager. With a set standard thrown at you from the internet beauty. In a way, that’s a form of teasing too – if you’re eyebrows aren’t on fleek, if you’re butt isn’t big or if you don’t apply your make up like an MUA, you simply aren’t good enough. That’s what we’re indirectly told anyway. Everyone is talking about being on “fleek”, “goals” and wanting to “slay”. Are those temporary trends really going to benefit your future or quality of life?
I never left my room without caking myself with foundation and of course people judged me for wearing too much make up too! I quickly realised nothing I ever do will be right. Someone will always have something to say to the choices I make.
Ironically cosmetics quickly became one of my favourite things in the world at such a low point in my life. Everything I know about beauty trends and the application of make up is self taught (with the help of youtube of course). But no amount of make up could help with problems beyond the surface.
This to my surprise led me to a bigger blessing in disguise. I discovered other aspects of me that make me so much more attractive than had I just been relying on superficial beauty.My physical flaw made me want to become confident, charismatic and intellectual because at least I’d have that to offer even if I was never considered to LOOK “beautiful”.
I realise this post is mainly directed towards women but men have it hard too. At least women have each other to speak to about these problems- at least in an ideal world. Men are usually a lot more reserved and suffer on their own.
Looking back now I’m grateful for being put through these struggles. Maybe I wouldn’t be who I am right now without my scars, maybe I wouldn’t even be attempting to write this post because I simply wouldn’t have experienced it for me to write.
Just a few words of encouragement:
Don’t let anybody get you down!
You will become the most amazing, well rounded person.
You will become the best version of you.
The people that see the value in YOU will remain, and those are the kind of people you want to surround yourself with.
Only now, at the age of 24 am I really learning how to love myself. The bare faced version, the cake faced version, the dopey unladylike version, the extroverted- introvert version. No matter what version of me you SEE, I know it’s the real me and my personality stays the same for every version.
Enough with the sob story now. Here are some Progress pictures.
Now. I’m really, really nervous about posting these because some of you guys are the harshest critics!
I hate being in such a vulnerable, naked state but I’m gonna take one for the Team anyway #skindeep y’all.
The pictures were taken roughly 6months apart:
Thanks for your time!
Please feel free to share your skin stories below 🙂